23 is over.

I hold crushes and attraction on two different levels. I've been attracted to numerous people in my life, but I've only had a crush on about two, I think. The first one being Scott. The second one being John, currently.

Scott ended up being a mistake that led to heartbreak and self-loathing. I think things will be different with John, but not too different. I think I'm setting myself up for heartbreak, but I'm not sure if it's a mistake. I somehow feel that I'm going to come out of it happier than before. I'm closer to John than I was with Scott. We have a stronger relationship and I feel very blessed by his friendship. John is too kind of a person to be harsh and cruel.
I just know I'm going to end up being heartbroken over it. Even if he isn't harsh about it, I will be. But maybe, he won't have to shut me off. He's graduating in the spring. Maybe once I don't see him every single day, I'll move on. Out of sight is out of mind. But I'm just brainstorming here. For the time being, it's all hypothetical.
I just know that I like him a lot. More than Scott I think. He makes me happy inside. I'm not in love, I just really like him and I miss him. I don't think we'd do well in a relationship together, just being the type of people that we are. Friendship is good enough for me, even though I feel stronger about it than he probably does. But I have to remember my birthday horoscope, and forget about what Jimmy Eat World is telling me. I have to wait. John isn't "the one." I'm way too young for that.

This is all a part of life. I have to get over my emo bullshit and move on.

Let's see where this takes me...