Happy halloween!

I'm dressing as "white trash" tonight...I made a short little dress out of a white trash bag. I'm wearing it with metallic leggings and hooker makeup. XD Tonight should be fun.

This weekend, I'm heading up to Wagon Tongue one last time this year. I can't wait. I'm considering it a "writer's retreat," even though it's just me. I plan on getting a ton of writing done up there. I'm going to freeze my butt off, but that will only help trigger inspiration.

See you Monday.

=]

New Dave Melillo demo. I love it. Listen here. He's such an amazing, talented musician. I'm a huge fan of his solo work. Unfortunately, he's now a member of the shitty Cute Is What We Aim For. Hopefully it's only temporary, and the fact that he's releasing a demo is a good sign, but he still doesn't have any plans to leave Cute. It's too bad, because he has more talent than the rest of them. I posted his video for Knights of the Island Counter a few days ago.

In general, I'm happy. Haven't written anything good lately, but hopefully better inspiration will come this weekend. I finished Haunted by Chuck Palahniuk. Amazing book. I'm now onto Fight Club, which I hope will be equally good. Palahniuk is brilliant. I can't believe I never realized this until recently.

I adore this video.

Beautiful girl.

The Amityville Horror was good. Very intense. There were a TON of cliches (creaking swing set, barking dog, etc) but it seemed to work. It got less cliche as the movie went on. Definitely a new favorite horror flick. I have to watch the original.

Today I'm in a really good mood. I'm smiling right now. For what reason? Well, there is none. I'm just happy, I guess. It's probably still some dsjhfjdshfjs left over from sunday.

I haven't gotten out of the house much this break, which is sad. But hopefully that will change.

Check out this video. I absolutely adore it....it's nice to see GUYS reach out to GIRLS in that way.
Beautiful Girl - INXS

From MCR to Queen.

Today, my mom and I actually got along very well. We're really so much alike - maybe that's why we don't typically get along. But now she's hooked on The Academy Is..., so I can talk to her about that. She thinks William Beckett is cute, and she met him last night. Haha. She's not the only one.

In the Halloween spirit, I'm going to go watch The Amityville Horror (the remake). I've never seen it myself, but I've heard good things about it. It sounds absolutely fascinating...kind of like the book In Cold Blood, by Truman Capote. Great book.

Later.

The greatest night of my life.

<3
This one's for you, Grandpa.

<3

First crush.

This one boy taught me a lot, and he has no idea. Even though he broke my heart, he's still a source of inspiration to me every day. He wasn't technically the first crush I had, but the first real one, in my opinion.

Scott was in my Language Arts class in 7th grade. He was cute and funny. I liked him instantly. I liked him for three long years, unrequited. It wasn't until 9th grade when I realized that he could never like me. I hadn't talked to him since 7th grade, so I was only crushing on what I thought he was. But I finally snapped and spent an afternoon crying in a bathroom at school.

But as upsetting and heartbreaking as it was, here I am, a year later, completely moved on. It wasn't easy, and it took months and months for my transition to be complete. Now I look at him and think, "why did I ever like that scrawny twig?"

The thing it taught me was to not be tied down by anybody. I spent three years of my life tied down by him, crushing on him so hard without the feelings being mutual. I spent three years of my life looking at the back of his head at football games. I spent three years of my life being lovesick. But now that those three years have past, I'm the happiest I've ever been. Sure, I'm interested in some guys. But I would never consider them a crush, because they don't make my heart flutter the way it did with Scott.

I don't throw the word "crush" around much anymore. Because though a crush is nothing compared to love, I still consider it a crucial, important thing. Few people go through high school being in actual love. Almost everyone goes through high school with at least one crush. That's what high school is to me, four years of getting to experiment and taking test drives. When I sit at my special spot, looking over the football field, watching some sports team practice, my feet crunching on the dry leaves coating the grass, I know this. I know that I can't be tied down by a crush.

New.

This blog is new. I just came from using LJ, but I think that blogspot is easier to use. I had one before, you can check it out here.

This is kind of a cheesy, sappy story, but I have to tell it on all of my blogs because it's an important part of who I am/my blogs.

The title of my blog came from the song Almost Here by The Academy Is.... The lyric "our time is almost here" relates back to their first album Almost Here, which I absolutely adore and it's my favorite album to date. This song is the final track on the album, which holds a special meaning to me.

That album means a lot to me, not because it's amazing and The Academy Is... is my favorite band. My grandfather died this past March, and during the last week of his life, I couldn't take my TAI... playlist off repeat. They mean so much to me and they helped keep me sane, and they put a smile on my face when times were tough. I remember the night of March 17th, 2008, when my mother got a phone call from my grandma. My grandpa had been in the hospital/hospice since January 31st, and was very ill. My grandma said that my grandpa was having a tough night. So my mom put on her coat and got ready to leave to go to the hospice. I wanted to go with her like always, because I wanted to be with my grandpa, even though it made me sick to see him the way he was. But I didn't say anything and watched my mother go.

I was so scared that this was going to be the night that my grandpa finally died, the same sick fear that I had felt every day during his sickness. When my mom left, I grabbed my ipod and sat on the stairs. Almost Here was the first song that popped up. And that song helped me accept that it was time for my grandpa to die. It was like he was speaking to me for the last time. He seemed to be telling me that his time was coming, and that I needed to be brave.

So listen up.
I worked in daylight feeding fashion to housewives.
For just this once, I'll take my chances on truck stops and state lines.
Go ahead and tell them again.
Well I think that I know that they won't remember.
Go ahead and tell them twice.
Yeah, twice is nice, but three times is just right.

Hey, hey now we're almost home.
I'm missing you to death, but it's all for the best, I know.
Hey, hey we're not far from home.
I've got my pride, and I'll let you sleep tonight.

So listen up.
My old friends have been dropping like houseflies.
The smoking gun still sits in my pocket and I know how to use it.
Go ahead and tell them again.
Well I think that I know that I won't forgive them
for turning their backs when we started to get busy.
Yeah twice is fine, but three times is just right.

Hey, hey now we're almost home.
I'm missing you to death, but to each his own.
Hey, hey we're not far from home.
I've got my pride, and I'll let you sleep tonight.

Hey, hey now we're almost home.
I'm missing you to death, missing you to death.
Hey, hey we're not far from home.
I'll swallow my pride and push back my seat tonight.

I'm on my feet.
This isn't like us anyway.
I'm running...
Our time is almost here.

That night, I finally accepted the fact that it was time for him to go.
He died at 8:45 AM the next morning.